James Wang's Web Page

Welcome to the web page of James Wang. This is the official site for all things James Wang related. Please feel free to explore my site, find out about me, and remember to sign my guestbook.

Loser Bit

This site makes use of CSS, JavaScript, and frames (of the 'i' variety) but should still be fully navigable in browsers without these features. There's also one or two Flash videos. The site is best viewed with Firefox, but also works with Internet Explorer 5-7 and Opera 9. I haven't tried it with other browsers, please let me know if there's a problem (there shouldn't be).

About Me

My name is James Edward Lieng-Doh Wang, I am 23 years old and am one quarter Chinese. I finished university this summer, and currently live with my parents in Leicestershire whilst I look for work. You can find out more about my history later in this section, and I have so many interests that they need a section all on their own. I also keep a weblog which you are free to read. To contact me, read on to the next page.

Contact

If you are lucky enough to know my telephone number, address, or personal email, then you can contact me by any of these methods. If you don't, you can send an email to j•wang{at}tentins•com. Alternatively, you can post a message on my guestbook.

History

On 5^th February 983 A.D., Thorbjörn Fältskog was born into the world to Swedish weasel farmers Adolfus and Hillevi. Thorbjörn's parents were warned in a dream that he would be no good at football, he was also a very ugly baby. Since they were evil weasel farmers, they decided to sacrifice Thorbjörn to Skoll, a deamon wolf god that's going to eat the sun one day. They took him to Norway on 'holiday' and dropped him into a fjord.

The fjord was very cold, and somehow Thorbjörn did not die, but continued to live in a suspended state, floating around waters in the artic circle for almost 1000 years. He was discovered by Chinese government scientists who were doing research into the jaguar shark. They used special Chinese techniques to revive Thorbjörn, and then took him back to Beijing to decide what to do with him.

Meanwhile, other people in the Chinese government were looking all over the world for a really clever Chinese baby that they could kidnapp and condition. They wanted to kill the Dalai Lama, and then swap their conditioned baby for the newly announced top monk. Using special Chinese techniques, they predicted that a really clever Chinese looking baby was going to be born in Manchester in February 1983.

The two groups of Chinese government people got together and devised a plan. They decided to swap the ugly, 1000 year old, Swedish baby, for the really clever Chinese looking baby as soon as it was born, and hope that the parents would not notice. Chinese government doctors infiltrated the hospital in Manchester using special Chinese techniques, and make a swap as the baby was delivered. The parents never noticed that the infants had been swapped, and took their new, ugly, 1000 year old, Swedish baby, and named him James Edward Lieng-Doh Wang.

The Chinese government tried to kill the Dalai Lama, but all their attempts failed because he is a Tibetan monk and has very special Tibetan monk techniques of avoiding assassination. This is unfortunate for the Chinese looking baby because as a result he has spent his whole life in a Chinese laboratory. He is known only as Krang, and works as a slave for the jaguar shark scientists.